Bonus Mom Gifts:
Gift Ideas to Make Her Feel Accepted
with Thoughtful Gifts, Gestures, and Jewelry with Quote Messages
When it comes to finding bonus mom gifts, what's important to remember is that the relationship we have with our bonus mom or step mom can become more than just a polite acceptance of her place in our family. It can become a true friendship.
It can vary considerably depending on if she helped raise you from when you were young, to if she recently joined your family, and you are already grown and living outside of the family home.
Do you know how you feel about your step mom or bonus mom yet?
As an adult step-daughter it may be challenging to express your true feelings for her. You don't want her to feel uncomfortable or obligated to return your gestures of friendship if she is new to the family so finding bonus mom gifts may seem a bit too personal.
You may not even know exactly how you feel about her presence in the family yet. And of course, it may be influenced by what the circumstances are of how your father ended up being eligible for marriage.
That said, if you are calling your step mom a “bonus mom” and stumbled upon this article, we will assume that she is someone you wish to have a relationship with. Otherwise you may be searched for articles on step mothers rather than bonus moms.
As an adult step daughter, how can I improve this relationship?
As an adult step daughter we have the opportunity to honor our bonus mom for being our father's partner, but also as a woman of her own value who has her strengths as well as insecurities. She will always appreciate knowing she is loved.
Expressing gratitude and love for your bonus mom can take on different forms, all of which are special. Even if she is not much of a gift person, she will always love getting a card or letter expressing your feelings towards her.
It is in your hands to create a sense of true appreciation for the woman she is and the life journey she has traveled. A bonus mom or step mom gift can be a way for you to share these feelings with her.
What is a bonus mom definition and meaning?
Is there another word for bonus mom?
A bonus mom is the person who loves you like a mother and calls you her own. Although there isn’t another word for bonus mom, we often substitute the title of step-mother for bonus mom, a bonus mom can also be a family friend, an aunt, an extended family member, or anyone in your life who is “like a mom.”
A step mom is most often the wife of the father of a child and not the biological mother. The term can also be used to describe the step mother of a stepchild, or a woman who is cohabiting with a man who has children from another relationship.
It can describe a woman who is a full-time, unconditionally loving mother to kids that are not biologically her own, but that of her partner.
It can also describe a women who takes on no mothering role at all, but is simply dating or married to someone with kids.
Perhaps this definition of a step mom varying in degrees so much in how hands on she parents is why the term Bonus Mom has been created. It creates a strong sense of love, affection and hands on parenting.
In short, a bonus mom is a term used for a woman who has become a mother figure to an adult who's not her biological child, but is still very much loved by her.
Bonus Moms may be:
- A step mom
- A woman who is “like a mom”
- A woman who is a mentor, elder, or someone who has guided you in life
- A best friend’s mom who you grew up with who was “like a second mom”
- A mother in law
One can have both a mom and multiple bonus moms in her life
Bonus moms can come in many different shapes and sizes and look like any other women in society. They can be your best friend, sister, brother, etc.
For this article we will be assuming that most readers consider their bonus moms a step mom, but our tips and gift giving suggestions remain the same for all bonus moms.
What insecurities might your bonus mom may have?
If you're reading this article, chances are good that you want to show your bonus mom some love. And this is great! But before we dive into the gifts themselves, let's look at why it might be difficult for her to accept bonus mom gifts at first.
She is not sure of her place in the family or even what she should be called
The title “step mom” makes many women feel uncomfortable due to the negative connotation that has become part of modern culture from stories such as Cinderella and her “evil step mother.” Yet not every step mom feels it is her place to call herself a “Bonus Mom.” That is a more intimate title that she may wait to see if her step-children decide to use.
If you are an adult step daughter and the title Bonus Mom has not yet been determined in your relationship, this title change can be a special gift you give her. By calling her a Bonus Mom you are inviting her into a new kind of friendship and acceptance within the family and may forever impact the kind of relationship you have with her.
If she became part of the family under stressful circumstances (like an affair) it can be an especially fragile situation
Even if it was many years ago and you no longer hold any resentment, she likely still feels tension. Insecurities that could cause a bonus mom to feel unappreciated include the following:
Insecurities of a bonus mom may include feeling like they aren't as good as the other moms, or feeling like they don't deserve to be called "mom.”
If you were an adult when she entered into the family she may also feel like the term “bonus mom” gives her more credit than is due because she did not have a hand in raising you.
Other insecurities, both practical and emotional
They are not the biological parent, so they do not have any legal rights to make medical decisions on behalf of children if something were to happen to both parents;
- They feel like they don't fit into a new generation of children and may be judged negatively by their own children;
- They worry that they won't be able to meet expectations;
- They worry about being replaced by another woman who has more genetic ties to her husband's children than she does
Whether she is a stepmom or a bonus mom, she may often feel like she is walking on eggshells. If this is something you would like to change for her, thoughtful gifts and a little note now and then can make a significant difference.
Why bonus mom gifts can make her feel part of the family
Gifts for bonus moms can make them feel part of the family, and handmade gifts seem to be given with more love than a store-bought gift.
A bonus mom necklace makes such a perfect gift because it tells your bonus mom that she is important to you, and that you will always be there for her.
Bonus moms can be a huge blessing to a family, even if the children are adults now and live outside of the family home. However, they may still not always be sure how they fit into the family dynamic.
It can be very confusing and she may feel she is constantly trying to read your mind to act as you would prefer.
When we made our bonus mom necklace we included a card that would help you with finding the perfect words to accompany your bonus mom gifts.
If you feel unsure of exactly what to write in a card or even where to find a greeting card that expresses your feelings for this unique relationship, this is the perfect.
Being a bonus mom is not easy. It's hard for her to know what she should do for large family events or even small family get togethers. She may love you unconditionally but still feel at times like she is not really part of the family. The last thing she thinks you are searching for are gifts for a bonus mom.
Why do handmade gifts seem to be given with more love?
So let's start with gifts! We know that when it comes to gifts, handmade tends to mean more than anything else—even science has proven that recipients more often perceive that a handmade gift – even when purchased and not homemade – are perceived as being given with more love and affection.
A bonus mom can be gifted with anything from flowers to jewelry, but if you are desiring to show her you truly care for her, a little extra effort will make all the difference, regardless of it is for a birthday gift, Christmas, Mother's Day or any other occasion.
For example, there are so many different ways to show your love and appreciation for your Bonus Mom. But what if you don't know what she likes? Or if she is uncomfortable with emotional bonus mom gifts?
at you see her as part of your family and that she is important to you and your family.
A bonus mom can make your life easier, so giving her a gift can be a great way to show how much you care about her. If you have children, you may want to nurture this relationship she has as a “Bonus Grandma” in their lives.
She will appreciate getting something from you, because it lets her know how much you appreciate everything she does for you. It also shows that you see her as part of your family and that she is important to you and your family.
The best gifts for your bonus mom come from the heart. They show that you've put thought into what would mean something to her specifically, instead of just picking something off the shelf because it was there and you needed a gift.
A bonus mom necklace makes such a perfect gift for many reasons. It's not expensive, but it still shows her how much she means to you. It also shows her that her hard work is appreciated by everyone in the family.
Our Blessed with the Best Bonus Mom is one of our most-loved gifts
You can also personalize it. Here at Gutsy Goodness we have additional charms that can be added or even birth month beads that could represent all the children in her life or grandchildren.
Jewelry is always a nice gift that announces to the world “she is my bonus mom” because she gets the opportunity to wear it and show it to her friends. It’s a sentimental way to honor her being a bonus mom and she gets to feel more confident with that title.
Not sure if she’d like the necklace? A keychain is also a popular choice because it can be used daily or occasionally or even be clipped onto a purse or tote bag.
You can also choose from our wide selection of necklaces and pendants that have other inspirational sayings to find one that's just right for gifts for bonus mom. It may not specifically say Bonus Mom, but rather celebrate something she is passionate about, from her grandkids to gardening, playing the piano to her love of her dog.
Our favorite Bonus Mom Gift Ideas
There are many gift guides online with a list of random products you can purchase for a bonus mom gifts. So we’ve decided to help you shop for something more personal such as a bonus mom necklace or other things she would be interested in.
The best way to narrow down selections is to take a Gift Quiz like our own here at Gutsy Goodness. It can help you discover new gifts, but also give you the chance to consider the interests and styles of the person you are shopping for.
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Give the gift of family. Does she have kids? Grandkids? Give her a gift that represents everyone she loves and she will feel your unconditional acceptance?
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Gift the gift of something she is passionate about. What conversations does she enthusiastically jump into? Does she like wildlife? Maybe a giraffe necklace or a donation to a special organization.
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Give her the gift of your time.
Does she seem to want to spend time with you but is reluctant to ask? Would she like spending time with her grandkids? Plan a special outing just with her and not your dad.
- Give the gift of an experience. Does she love to do something that she never gets to do because it’s not your dad’s favorite? Get her tickets to a Broadway show coming to town if that her favorite.
Quotes about being a bonus mom or a step parent
When you are feeling stumped about what to write in a card, the perfect quote can help you fill that big white space with words that reflect your feelings. You can find additional ideas by searching online “like a mom” and many quotes and quips will pop up.
Here are some of our favorites:
The most valuable gifts you can give your bonus mom are time, attention, and an openness to building a relationship with her.
To be a bonus daughter that shows her willingness to have a friendship, you have to makes time for her, whether that is returning a text with a smiley face or even shopping for an extra special gift.
Happy Mothers Day and other days to celebrate a bonus mom
Did you know that although there are no official days for celebrating step moms or bonus moms, there are multiple designated days that are wonderful times for gift giving for a bonus mom? And don’t forget to wish her a “Happy birthday, bonus mom!”
• Step Mother's Day - Sunday following Mother's Day
• National Stepfamily - September 16
• National Family Day – Fourth Monday in September
• Respect For Parents Day – August 1st
• Mother’s Day - second Sunday in May
• International Women Day – March 8
• Mother-In-Law Day – Fourth Sunday of October
• Global Day of Parents – June 1
• Grandparents Day - first Sunday after Labor Day
• Friendship Day - second Sunday of August
• Thank Your Mentor Day - January 25
Conclusion
Relationships are never easy, but those that we put the most thought and intention into are often the most rewarding.
Whether your bonus mom is a step mom for yourself, your spouse’s step mom, or even someone who is like a mom, the friendship you establish is important. It will be something your entire family may benefit from, including your own children, or the children you hope to have some day.
If you have a step mom and you have struggled with creating a positive relationship so you can call her a bonus mom, you are not alone. Creating a comfortable environment for your step mom can make the difference in whether you two are able to connect or not. The best thing to do is to jump in and take action instead of waiting for her to come to you.
The bottom line is that regardless of the relationship we have with our bonus mom it can be strengthened and one way is through thoughtful bonus mom gifts. The key is to consciously decide how we want to interact with her and take steps to make those decisions a reality so that it has room to endure and flourish.
